How To Improve Your Golf Score – (A Spoof)

A golf course is one of the most beautiful sights that I have ever seen.

The lush green grass, the trees, even the sand traps. On a warm summer day nothing can be better

So serene -  so relaxing. You can put away all the strife of daily life and just enjoy yourself.

You’re out there on the golf course. It’s a beautiful day. The sun is warming the old back. Old muscles are loosening up.

It’s great to be alive and feeling so good.

You just know you are gonna tear this course apart today.

You know all there is to know about this game.  All the tricks of the trade.

You don’t know why you pay the pro to give you lessons. You will do it your way anyhow..

What was it the Pro told you last week when he gave you all the tips to improve golf distance?

Oh yeah, the grip. That interlocking grip that he uses to keep the club from opening up. But you prefer the old baseball grip.

So, you tee up your ball and take a few practice swings. You’ll show them what you learned to improve golf swing speed.

You step up and plant you feet wide apart and take a cut at the ball. In fact you lunge at it. You whiff.

Then you act as if that was just a practice swing and step up again.

This time you connect. Boy that felt good. Probably right down the middle. Then you look up.

It’s a real worm burner, rolling down the right side of the fairway about 30 yards. You walk down and take out a wood.

You hit into a trap. It takes you 5 shots to get out of the trap. Another 4 shots and you are on the green.

You three putt and write down a 5 down on your card. It pretty much goes this way for seventeen more holes.

Except for number seven, which you only double bogie – so, you mark down a birdie on your card.

You don’t need an instructor to tell you this trick of how to improve golf game.

Now you are back in the club house, having a couple of your favorite refreshments. Your golfing buddies come trooping in.

They all ask you how you shot today, and with every swig of your favorite beverage. your score gets lower and lower.

Forgotten are all those trees you hit, the sand traps that you finally just threw your ball out of  or the five balls in the creek.

Everybody is slapping each other on the back and offering congratulations, for today as with every round of golf – Everybody had their best round ever.

After all, Golf is just another version of liars Poker.



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